The Bright Side

(Dee appears at Emily's bus stop just as she is getting off the bus.)
Emily: There you are! I've been wanting to ask you something. Do you have a birthday?
Dee: What? Of course not.
Emily: Really? So you've always been here? There wasn't some day when you just popped into existence?
Dee: Maybe? I don't know. I don't remember.
Emily: How can you not remember?
Dee: It was a very long time ago. I barely remember what kind of life was around back then. Or whether there was any. Besides, you don't remember being born.
Emily: Why don't you go back and check?
Dee: I suppose I can do that.
(He vanishes and reappears.)
Dee: Hm. Looks like I appeared when the first life did.
Emily: Right, so you do have a birthday!
Dee: Hmm. Is the word 'birth' specific to the origins of the living? I suppose not...
Emily: Even if it is I don't care, Dee! The English language is not made for people who aren't alive. I'm going to call it your birth whether you were born or not. You came into existence some amount of time ago that must be measurable, so you must have a birthday. Right?
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Alt text: it was a tuesday